I THANK YOU!

If we believed wholeheartedly our importance to the people in our lives, how just offering a smile, which takes practically no effort at all, can make a body feel like a million bucks, we'd feel like a million bucks.  I think sometimes people don't quite get the affect they have on someone just by sharing their own brand of unique qualities that make them who they are, which can bring sunshine to a person when before only clouds were visible.

Once I was diagnosed with cancer it was like everything in my life stopped, and then restarted in slow motion with everybody else on speed dial.  I couldn't emotionally or physically keep up anymore.  But the people in my life that have always been there reached back with a hand extended, and just waited for me to grab hold.  I've been holding on as tight as I can these last few months.

Stopping by for surprise visits, sharing a smile, kindly given advice -- or bringing a little something like pearls from Vietnam, special bracelets made by two special ladies, a hand knitted shawl or blankets gifted with a lot of love, or even reindeer antlers that light up and make me smile, all expressions of, I was thinking of you and you matter.  Spending precious time that could be spent at work, on vacation, with friends, or in solitude -- all for me, and I appreciate it so much.  I can't even begin to express how much actions, big or small, lift spirits, especially when a small world is rocked. 

My son and his family came all the way from Hawaii to see me a couple of weekends ago, and I was on the moon.  They stepped off the plane into my life again, and not even the cancer could pull me down.  And I've had a lot of this coming my way since the invasion of cancer.  I have my own frickin' angel network.  My big sis made her home my home as I go through treatment and surgery, more treatment and more surgery, without me having to worry about anything but getting better.  My niece, who is forever my champion and vice versa, has always been there for me.  My friends, who have been my staple in life for keeping me sane, and grounded, and content and hilarious when I need to be, are my true friends soul deep.  My colleagues -- most of which also fit into the 'friend' category have flooded me with cards, good wishes, and gifts that twist my heart with emotion and affection, have been travelling from Seattle to Tacoma to get me to and from my chemo sessions. My clients have sent me cards with their many blessings for good health, and beautiful bouquets of flowers.  I am blessed by all of the attention! These angels have helped me to see and truly understand that sometimes it really does take a village, and I'm so happy I'm part of their village and them mine.  I am grateful! 

I have my days when my lower lip is dragging so low to the ground it could serve as a street sweeper.  Days when I don't feel like acting like everything is okay and acceptable because it would be a lie.  This is when I get bitchy, and ornery, and mean...mostly scared.  Walk away.  Hey, I know I'm in big trouble with pancreatic cancer and breast cancer on my plate, but seeing and feeling and understanding the true nature of family and friendship, and the personal sacrifices everybody in my world is making on my behalf, puts a smile on my face and makes my day just that much better.  Personally, I believe that every time I smile something healing happens on the inside.

So when you ask me how I'm doing and I respond, I'm doing great! now you know why.  All of the above!  How can I NOT feel invincible with all my peeps holding me up!


"We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures."
Thornton Wilder